Positive Coaching, Negative Vibes

Barbara Bailey Kelley

Simmering just beneath the playground cheer and high-pitched squeals in football fields and school yards all across the Bay is a minor revolution that's leaving some coaches and parents inspired and others grumbling.

As an antidote to the madness sports often incite, legions of leagues send parents and coaches to workshops run by Stanford-based Positive Coaching Alliance. The groundbreaking premise? Sports should be fun. According to PCA founder and director Jim Thompson, 70 percent of kids burn out on sports by age 13, often because adults behave badly. PCA aims to tame whacked-out parents while showing coaches how to coach without breaking kids' spirit. "The first goal is to win," Thompson says. "The second is to use sports to teach life lessons." Even Lakers coach Phil Jackson, PCA national spokesman, thinks it's the right idea.

Tell that to übercoaches and cranky parents in some affluent communities where it's been a hard sell. They reluctantly come to class griping and snickering, convinced that self-esteem and edgy play are mutually exclusive.

Coach Ray McDonald, whose girls' softball team is nationally ranked, has been to four workshops and vows never again. The training is fine for parents and newbies, but for coaches at his level, it's too Pollyanna, he says. "It's totally in line with the new school way of thinking—everything is OK; no discipline," says McDonald. "It can work for some, but never for me. But that's how I was raised. It's hard to change."

Even true believers are unsure if training lasts. "People at workshops say, I'd never berate a ten-year-old or throw an F-bomb at an ump. But in the heat of the moment, they do it," says PCA trainer Bob Heckmann, basketball coach at Mountain View High. Still, the training is a start. "It's about message bombardment," he says. "That makes change."